Tremendously Intense Erotic Situations
Where the Elite Meet to Beat
BDSM Definitions
Definitions of some commonly-used terms
from a SnowBound presentation
Safe: the risks are reasonably estimated, and have been reduced as far as is consistent with achieving the effect sought)
Sane: each participant is sufficiently aware, and understands the consequences (and potential consequences) of their decisions)
Consensual: what happens is what all participants freely agreed to, and is done pursuant to the wants of all the participants)
Negotiation: the process of communicating between BDSM participants that involves expressing and coming to agreement on desired activity, roles, limits, safewords, and sharing other important information as necessary to create a fulfilling and satisfying scene for all participants.
BDSM: an encompassing term for a spectrum of activities including B&D (Bondage and Discipline), D/s (Domination and Submission), SM (Sadism and Masochism).
Play: engaging in BDSM activities and interaction.
Player: person who participates in BDSM play.
Vanilla: person who does not desire or participate in BDSM play, or activity not associated with or not involving BDSM play.
Roles:
- Top - player who inflicts sensation and/or bondage on another (pleasurable and/or painful)
- Bottom - player who receives sensation and/or bondage inflicted by Top
- Dominant - player who directs the scene, person in control, gives orders
- Submissive - player who gives control to Dominant, obeys orders
- Master/slave or Mistress/slave - consensual BDSM relationship in which the slave is "owned" by the Master/Mistress.
- Dom - short for Dominant, often non-gender-specific, may refer to male Dominant.
- Domme or FemDom - female Dominant.
Scene: period of time during which BDSM play is occurring, often has clear beginning and end.
The Scene: refers to the BDSM/leather community.
24/7: a D/s relationship that is "in scene" 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
Safeword: a word or set of words used to let the Top/Dom know the status of the bottom, while allowing insincere protestations for purposes of fantasy roleplay (Stop! Please Stop! Please Stop faster and harder, Please!).
Limit: used for both "boundaries" and "hard limits":
- Boundaries - edge of one's ability to handle sensation or other stimuli, physically or psychologically.
- Often refers to intensity of stimuli or of reaction to stimuli. Boundaries are often "pushable",as in "pushing the envelope" in corporate speak.
- Hard Limits - predetermined areas or boundaries beyond which Top/Dom may not push. Usually refers to specific activities.
Squick: a reaction somewhere between "ICK!" and nausea.
Button: a certain word, situation or action that causes a strong emotional or psychological reaction.
